That's gratitude for you.

That financial ruin I alluded to recently is getting closer. We'll be fine for December, but come January we really don't know if we'll be able to make rent. Someone mentioned maybe we should look into local animal rescues in case we have to surrender our pets. After hearing that, I just shut down, both physically and mentally. A sad amount of wallowing took place yesterday. An equally sad amount of pancakes were consumed in the pursuit of comfort. I was too angry and miserable to get any writing done, which doesn't help things at all. Yesterday was just... bad. And while I'd like to say it's nobody's fault, that would be a lie. But whatever, I'm not here to point fingers.

Yes, I am. *points upstairs*

Anyway, it snowed last night. Keep in mind that I've spent almost my entire life in Florida, so this was a big deal to me. It wasn't a lot of snow, but enough that it lifted my spirits a bit. It's cold enough that most of the snow was still around this morning. I needed some flour, as I wasn't feeling all that confident about the whole wheat pie crust I made. I needed all purpose flour for a new one. So I pulled on my boots, slipped into my jacket, and set off on foot for the nearest grocery store.

Who needs alcohol when you have snow? Trudging through the slush, I forgot all of our problems. The world was a beautiful, wonderful place. I was almost in tears, I was that happy. The only thing that could have made things better would've been... more snow! I slipped once or twice on small patches of ice, I couldn't feel my ears, and my jacket made me a little too warm in the trunk, but it was perfect. I got my flour, then decided to take the long way home. I saw all kinds of birds, there was a lady at a park with her kids and dogs, people were flocking to Starbucks, there wasn't much traffic, everyone seemed to be in a good mood. *sigh*

I don't think I can convey how happy snow makes me. The first time I saw any was when we were driving through Wyoming during our move to Oregon back in May. The hills were covered with it, and evergreen trees dotted the landscape. It was like a Christmas card, it was so lovely. I did cry then. *lol*


The photo doesn't do it justice.

Truth be told, if I were rich I would buy a tiny cabin in Montana, surrounded by hundreds of acres of wilderness. I'd have tea parties with bears and square dances with wolves and book clubs with elk. Alas, I am not rich. And I like where I am anyway. But still, you get the idea.

When I came home the dogs were thrilled to see me. That always feels good. I made some coffee and looked at the paper. I even did the crossword. I took the Tofurky out of the freezer and moved it to the fridge so it'll thaw completely by Thursday. I finally get to start cooking tomorrow, which is killing me because I want to do it NOW. I'm milking this chilly high for all it's worth. Some of the heaviness of our circumstances has seeped back in, but I'm trying to stay positive. If nothing else, I will enjoy this Thanksgiving.

My point is, not a day goes by that I am not grateful for living in Oregon, but today it was that much more profound. No matter what the future brings, I have today. And it's sappy as hell, but I am thankful.

Don't worry, sarcasm and pessimism will return after Thursday. ;D